Who Told you That You Were

Automated transcript, lightly edited for readability. Scripture appears as spoken; the video is the authoritative teaching.

A Vessel for His Word

Lord of Lords, without you, I avail myself to you this morning. I just ask that your Ruach, your spirit, do what you say that it can do, and that is to speak and to move and to activate through us. Please do. Your people have come to hear from you, not from me. But use this vessel in a mighty, powerful, amplified way. In Yeshua's name, that name that itself contains power. Amen. When Matt sent me a text asking if I could talk for 35 to 45 minutes, I was like, yeah, I'm going to always say yes. I've made that commitment to God. I'm going to always say yes because he desires to use us. And then I said, well, what do you want the topic to be? And he said, I don't remember what his exact words were, but what thought came to my mind was, it's the experiences that I get to have with those women that I talk to in the jail. When I walk into that room and I simply bring truth, what a difference truth makes in the lives of others.

The Belt of Truth

It is my heart's desire to wear my belt of truth like that of a corset. That it just fits you tight and it's all geared up and it's beautiful and it gives you curves and it makes you look good. Right? Like that's the desire for my belt of truth. So I study his word. And it hasn't been always an easy thing. This past Wednesday, I got fired. I've been fired twice in my life. I'm 55 and I'm the sole provider of a household and I work like a man. Like I get out there and I make it happen and I get the money and I bring it home and I fry up the bacon and I do turkey bacon. And although I'm liking that beef bacon, as the sole provider of a household, when an event such as a loss of a contract happens, it might find you in a place of dismay.

Like father, what's going on here? Love this Jewish Jesus in this great. Oh yeah, oh my God! Because even though I teach the discovery of change in our lives, one thing is for certain: he never changes. He's always had a plan and you've always got a purpose, and in alignment with him, the purposes of him will come through you, and it will never be just about you. The things that we go through in this realm will never be just about us. It is about us. Some lessons are somebody else's. But because we are so intertwined in their life, it often feels like it's my lesson. It's theirs, especially when you have teenagers. It's theirs. We're just intimately intertwined.

A Severing and a Repositioning

So I've been fired twice. Wednesday of this week. And when I got the text message, although I didn't like it, I thought, great, y'all, this is exactly what I knew would happen. I knew that this severing of the ties here equated that you were moving me out there. Little did I know. What am I thinking about Matt asking me to fill in at that time? I was in the injury of getting that text message. But later, it was like, you're positioning me differently. This is not an injury. This is not a wound. This is not a bad thing. But in the natural, some of those things can feel bad. He was positioning me. The past time that I was fired, this is the part that I really want to share with y'all. I worked for the school district for 17 years and there came a time in my life that I knew that I just had to do something differently. So I changed jobs, I changed careers, and I started selling insurance. And I loved my season there because it was in those five years that my relationship with God just came into alignment.

Discovering His Great Yehovah

My papa's a Baptist preacher, so I've been a church girl. I loved Sunday school and I loved youth group and I loved vacation Bible school. So I've always had a love for the Lord. But this great Yehovah God, I did not know. I knew that God loved me, and I knew that I needed to live right, and I knew that I needed to pray, and I knew that I needed to worship. But this great Yehovah, I had not been introduced to him. So in this five-year span of working in this place, I refer to it as my tabernacle. This was a business. It was a place of business. It was an office with two desks, two computers, a printer, some filing cabinets.

I hooked up the kitchen in the back a little bit. This was my tabernacle. I had hidden a place in my life, in my living room, where I laid it all down at the ottoman. And I said, oh God, there's got to be more to this life than this. There's got to be more to this life than what I've been doing for these 40-something years. There's got to be more. You had a dream of Joseph God. You got a dream of me and I want it. I want it. I want what you dreamed of me. I'd never really dreamed of myself because I was this awkward kid on a dirt road in Georgia. If you grew up and had chicken houses, if you were successful in that realm, that was just rural America.

That's how it is. So I didn't have a dream of me. And I said, Lord, whatever my daddy dreamed of me, I'm trading it in for your dreams. And whatever my mama dreamed of me, I'm trading it in for your dreams. And that dream that my best friend had, that I would have a husband and a white picket fence— Lord, I don't know that that was ever mine, but I'm trading her dream in. And God, whatever dream I had of myself, consciously or subconsciously, I'm giving it to you because I want only you. What you dreamed of me. What you have for me.

Truth and Transformation

And then I began to study his word in a different way. I released all form of doctrine. I released all form of preconceived ideas of who he was because those five years were nothing but him clearing up his identity to me so that he could clear up my identity of me. I learned that he has such great audacious love for me, but not only that, that he likes me too. I used to think, if mom and dad are mad at you, then God's got to be mad at you too. He doesn't work like that, right? He understands why Heather does what Heather does. And he's not holding accountable all the tiffs and tats that we would like to think that he is.

He's saying, I know why you eat a pizza when you've had a bad day. Just come to me. So my relationship with him really took off. And I was at this insurance company and the Lord was teaching me about who he was. He was teaching me about how he never changes his mind about me. He was teaching me these five years. It was like being in his discipleship training class. And it was me and him and his word at my kitchen table, in my living room. In this office space, it was me and him. It was simple, just me and him.

The Prayer Language

And he was showing me that when we got to the part about praying and telling him, I was a little leery about that. And I said, oh God, if that is something that you want for me, if that is something that you want me to operate in, I want it. I don't want to think about what my mama had to say when I was 26. I want whatever you have for me. And I asked him for it. And he let me know that there were things in my life that were absolutely necessary to change. And one of the things I remember very clearly him saying to me was, "Heather Angel, I can't let a holy language reside in a willfully unholy vessel." And complete transparency here, I was still smoking. So I had to lay some stuff down. And he let me know that it was going to be a little harder that time. And it was, and I'm good. But I asked for it. And I remember being at the insurance office, and I'd say, "Oh, Lord, please give me this language that I can pray for my children in a way that the enemy cannot understand and use against me." Like this prayer was just on repeat, on repeat, on repeat.

On a Hard Day

And this particular morning, he says to me, "Heather, what about other people's children?" I'm very animated. I'm glad I was there by myself. I hit the desk and I stand up and I say, "Oh, Father God, if you give it to me, I will pray anytime, anywhere, anyhow, over anyone. Just give it to me. Just give it to me." And he did. And it came on a really hard day. It came on a day that there were 18 cop cars in my yard. My son was going to jail. And I'm in insurance class. And I am not happy with the Lord at this present moment in time. I just say, "Okay, God, I got four more hours of class. Just let me hold it together because once I start crying, you know I don't stop.

Let me hold it together until we get through with class." We did. I go out to my Honda Accord. It was champagne in color. And I go to slide down in that seat and I go to open my mouth because I was fixing to let the Lord have all this confusion and out came this beautiful, messy, sloppy gibberish. And I was like, oh. And then I held my tongue because I needed to know that I could make it stop. And he held my tongue. But then I prayed all the way back to my home. And I haven't quit praying since. Lord, give it to me. I'll pray anytime, anyplace, anywhere, anyhow, to you, over anyone, over anything. Because see what this world needs?

This world that we are a part of, this world that we have been invested in, this world that we've been implanted in. They need somebody that sees God differently. They need somebody that has such a relationship and such a testimony with the Almighty that they say, what she's got, I want it.

Right? When Billy Graham died, I was in my living room. And I cried. I said, oh, Father God, if I could have a sliver of his mantle, just a sliver of his mantle, give it to me. I want it. I want everything that you have for me. And I used to think it wasn't right to even ask God for the blessings. It is. It is. See, this great Yohovo God, this Hebraic king, this Jewish Jesus, I have learned so much about how he really operates and what he really thinks that all I can do is share with you the exponential love and encouragement and empowerment that he wants us all to walk in. He wants you to walk in a room and make a difference whether you speak or not. There is power in worship. He taught me that.

Learning Worship

These five years I had a worship training session. He was teaching me and there was one moment, I don't remember exactly what exactly was going on, but I just knew that I had to worship. Like everything within me was going to break loose if I didn't break out some worship. So I'm at the insurance office and this regular customer comes in and he's like, da-da-da-da. I said, we don't open until 9? Yeah. I'm in worship. If you want to join me, come on in. Have a chair at 9 o'clock. I will service you. But until then, I cannot. And I worshiped like nobody was in the room. I had those little speakers as loud as they were going because there was so much in me that needed to be released into the atmosphere and up to the kingdoms and the throne room of God that I could not bring those words out of my own coming.

But whoever made that music had the words and I just sang. I sang with my eyes closed. I sang off key. I worshiped my king because he is the ever-changing, ever-present, all-solution God. Oh, and when I quit, I look at this man, and he's weeping. And he says, are you a worship leader? I'm like, no, I got thrown out of youth choir. And he said, I had a lot of worry when I walked in this door, but all I feel is peace. He said, I ain't slept really good in three days, but all I can do right now is go home and take a nap.

My Tabernacle

I said, okay. Okay. See, I call that place my tabernacle. I call that office and that five-year season of my life a tabernacle. That's where I went and I sought after the Lord. I had to have encounters with him. I had to be close. I had to smell him. I had to know him better than I had ever known him before. And I pursued him like a woman in love. I pursued him like a child that had been damaged and confused, and I just needed a daddy to straighten things out for me. I sought him like a mom, like that little orphan girl that didn't have a mom that loved her in the natural the way I needed to be loved in the natural. I sought him.

Learning El Shaddai

I sought him, and when he says to me, Heather, I can love you like a mother, I said, huh? He said, yeah, El Shaddai, the God of many breasts. I got plenty, plenty. I can nurture you. Holy one of Israel, nurture me. Nurture me. Let me know you and all your ways and all your facets and every part of your being. Let me know you. Let me know you. And then I studied about the prophetic. See, God is a prophetic God. There was nothing that Moses went through that God didn't tell him about first, right? There was all that Pharaoh stuff. God let him know what Pharaoh was going to do. He's a prophetic God. He says that we have the ability to be prophetic also. I don't know exactly what that meant, but when I found out that we could, I said, teach me, teach me. I want to be the most prophetic person in the building. When you want a word from the Almighty, I want to be able to prophesy in your life and give you a word because that is just a word of encouragement. I want you to tell this to Denae, okay? Denael, excuse me.

Called to See

I want to be a seer. And a seer can see in the natural, I mean supernatural. Because you are a spiritual being and a physical being walking through the realm simultaneously. You are both those things all the time. Eternity doesn't start at your death. It started at your birth. I want to be a seer. And I've asked the Lord to let me have it. And his response is, you know, I can't let you. And I said, yes, I do. Because I would see the Holy Spirit in and out ruminating around Danielle. And it would just be this glow and this beautiful, beautiful glow. And I would be able to see it with my natural eyes. And the less than mature woman, Heather, would be like, oh, girl, let me tell you what to see. And God needs the prophetic person to be able to say, I can see it, but it may not be for me to speak it yet. I can see it, but they may not be ready to hear it yet. But Lord, when you're in a desperate place, don't you want somebody to give you a prophetic word? Like the time I got fired. Let me back up. I also studied on deliverance.

Deliverance is Healing

And I was a little freaked out by deliverance because it was like, oh my, there's going to be this poltergeist scene and stuff's going to fly around and I just don't know if I'm ready for all that. But deliverance is nothing but healing. It's nothing but healing. There's some things that have happened to us along the way that hold good purpose. I've had a rough little childhood sometimes. But Heather, our name means you are a flower that flourishes in rocky soil. That's like the Almighty saying to you, things will get rocky, but don't you fear, because I created you, designed you, and made you to flourish despite the rocks. You are to be a fragrance in the lives of others, and you are beautiful to me. You are royalty. You are set apart, and you have more in you than you realize that you have.

You Are Royalty

But when it hits you, you're going to make deposits everywhere you go, right? Right? We have to know better who God is so we know better who we are because we need to be a people that know who we are. We need to know the gifts that we carry, multiple gifts, not just one. We need to know that if we are a giver, we are to go to the kingdom of God and ask before I give. A giver is a wonderful... What's that word? Oh, God, give it to me. Christy, you got it. What's the word? Enabler. Enabler. A giver is a great enabler, right? Right?

The Gifts We Carry

We just have to be in a place of repentance. And I love the word repentance. I hated it growing up. Repent, repent. But I love it now because I asked the Lord why I hated it. He said, well, look it up. And I'm like, there you go. Acting like my mama. Couldn't spell cat. And she had me look it up in the dictionary. C or K. Come on now. Look it up. So I look it up, and in English, repentance means to have a change—you're sorry and you change. Look it up in Hebrew. I mean, Greek. Greek and Hebrew, because the Word of God was written in Greek and Hebrew. Look it up in Greek. Oh, I like that much better, because it was a transition of heart. How lovely. But in Hebrew, Holy God of Israel, one word, return. Return. And the beautiful paragraph, return to your creator, your maker. Return. It's just a simple returning.

Return to Your Creator

So with all the gifts that we carry, we just are simply turning to God and saying, would you like for me to give here? Would you like for me to be encouraged in here? Would you like for me to impart a word of deliverance here? Would you like for me to do that? It's just that. It's just that. It's just simply you and him. So there's the praying in a different language, an intimate language, a language that he understands completely, and he needs somebody to speak his language in this earth. He needs somebody that will pray differently in this realm. But don't estimate that you're going to always know what you're praying about because if I knew the mind of God in some matters, I would shut my mouth.

Praying in a Different Language

I'm praying for three days one time. And inside of me, I'm just like, oh, I cannot wait because Easter's coming. I'm still in white church there. Easter's coming. And your little children are going to go to church. And they're going to get saved, although they were teenagers and bad. And y'all are going to all live happily ever after. Well, the Sunday before, I'm in church. And that is so not what happens. My son finds himself being arrested again. And I'm like, I've been fasting and praying for three days, and this is the answer that I get? Like, there's something wrong. Something's wrong with this God. My expectations were, something's wrong with this God. My prayer and fasting, although I had no idea what I was praying about, because sometimes when you're praying in that language, you don't know. My prayer and my fasting kept my son from being a murderer. It just got him locked up. But it kept him from murdering someone. There are going to be times and situations in this life and in this realm we will not have the fullness of all that we are created for.

Hidden Things Revealed

But as long as we're walking with him and seeking him, he's going to reveal those things to you. And that was part of this week's Torah portion. Deuteronomy . The hidden things, the secret things are known to God. But when they are revealed to you, they are for you and your children. That's one of the things I love about this congregation. I started being a part of FIT a year before I got custody of my grandchildren. And there were times in that old building I'd be like, man, God, what you got me here for? All these young'uns, I ain't got none. All these young people, I'm 50. What's the purpose? And then a year later, tragedy struck my home and my family, and I became a mom again.

And it was like, oh, God. You knew. You knew. Ain't nothing to surprise. You knew. You knew that I needed to develop relationships with this community so that when this tragedy hit me, I could trust them with my trauma babies. Right? Oh, he's a great guy. Don't ever let this realm make you think less. Danielle, are you wearing gold for real today? Is that a gold-colored shirt? Oh, my. You'll get it later. So I'm learning about this great Yahuwah God.

The Invitation to Pesach

And the last piece was this beautiful Jewish woman. Matter of fact, the boss said, "Miss Elaine's coming in, and she's very religious, and you and her will get along great." I'm like, "Thanks for that, boss." So she comes in, she's floating around, flittering around, we're making small talk, she mentions that she's Jewish, and my response was, "Well, my aunt Sadie used to say to always be kind to the Jews. Heather, whatever you do, always be kind to the Jews." And that was my limit of knowledge. And the first encounter I had was her invitation to Pesach. She invited me to her home. And she says, but you've got to dress up now. I said, I'm Georgia, blue jeans, Tshirt, dirt road. Dress? Yeah. Dress in your finest clothes to come to this meal. And I stand before you today as the bride of Christ, having a great perspective of his invitation to be his bride. The first date that we had was the Passover. And all these feasts are just a plethora of understanding the greatness of who he is and in that perspective of this realm and what I was made for.

Image Bearers of the King

Every one of us has purpose. Every one of us has placement. Every one of us are a perfectly designed image bearer of the king, of the king. And he has put within us the ability to carry his ruach, his very presence in any room that we enter. And it's his desire that we do this. It's his desire that we get past all the things that have been said to us. When Matt said, what do you got a script title? And I said, yeah, who told you you were? Because in the Garden of Eden, God asked Adam and Eve. They were afraid. They were ashamed. So they didn't go on their usual walk with him. And his response wasn't one of correction.

His response wasn't, what did you do? His response wasn't disappointment. His response wasn't, I told you. His response was, who told you? Who told you you were? So my question is, who told you you were less than? Who told you that you were less than wonderful? Who told you that this walk with God meant you had to be clean and perfect all the time? Who told you that you couldn't have emotions that run high? Who told you that you couldn't be a warrior and still be a praiser of the king? Who told you that you can't walk through this realm in the same way Yeshua HaMashiach did? Who told you that you were less? Who told you?

A Gift of Tenacity

Clark Maxwell, when I was five, I hope you edit this, told me, what are you, stupid or something? Because I couldn't read. I didn't get hooked on phonics. I couldn't read the little Bible scripture in Sunday school class. And he snatches it from me and says, what are you, stupid or something? I went my whole life with that right here. Till my king said to me, hey. I made you with that learning disability. You want me to tell you why? Because it takes you three times to do what the average reader does. You read it choppy. Then you read it with a little more understanding, and by the third go-round, you've got to flow.

That put in you some tenacity. That put in you a gumption. That put in you a fairness. That put in you this zeal that you ain't going to stop when you don't get it right the first time. I gave you that disability as a gift because I had a design within you that would require the tenacity that is necessary to make a movement move forward. And all those years, I didn't like me. All those years, I tried to cover it up. You should see my handwriting. I write really sloppy so you can't tell I can't spell, right? All those years, I thought something was wrong with me. All those years. Now, would I stand before you today and say I'm just mad at myself about wasted years?

No, that was training. That was training. And tomorrow, there'll be more training because he ain't finished with me yet.

You Can Discover Change

You can discover changed ministry. When I go to certain outreach groups and they have you announce who you are in your ministry and that kind of stuff for your nonprofit, I don't ever really think of it being something so big. Because for me, it has simply been my relationship with this great Yehovah God. That whether it be something I deem as good or evil that has hit my life, I have an understanding that I am like Job. And he has said, have you considered my servant Heather? Have you considered my servant Heather? For I will know what she will do with it. I may not know what I'm going to do with it. And it is the same for all of us. We are Josephs. All of us have dreams. All of us were created and designed. All of us are going to be in some pits that we made ourselves. I did some stupid stuff as a teenager. Some of us are going to be in pits because of other people's stuff. But both of those pits were necessary in developing the character required for Joseph to save a nation.

Know Who You Are

There's a nation around you. There's a nation down that hallway. You've got to know who you are, dads. You've got to know who you are, moms, because it is our job to train the prophet to prophesy. It is our job to train the giver to give. It is our job to train the encourager to be encouraging. It is our job to know effectively who we are and our purposes so that we can see it in them and teach them. They are our heritage. They are our future. They are His blessings. And he's got purpose in them being placed in your hands. But we got to know who we are.

A Deposit Every Week

I'm about to close with this, but when I started doing the jail stuff, I didn't even know what it was. It wasn't a nonprofit. It didn't even have a name other than YCDC—York County Detention Center. You can discover change. So I didn't have any of that. It was just me and God, and I knew that I had to make a deposit in that place every week, and that nothing could change me from making that deposit. All of it has just simply been my relationship with him. It's not been anything phenomenal or fantastic, although a relationship with him is. What I'm saying is there wasn't one day that he sat me down and just downloaded it all in my head.

It was go to jail, give him hope, go back again and give him hope, go back again and give them hope. And it just made sense that they saw me in jail. They needed to know they could see me on the outside too. So this man that I didn't know—I met him one time—gives me the keys to his church. And he said, sure, bring them over here. So on Wednesdays, I started meeting with them. And then after that, it was going to women's prayer meetings, teaching mamas how to pray effectively for their children. You don't go to God and tell him what Johnny's up to. Johnny is fully known by God, and God is not displaced by Johnny.

What you do is you pray in the authority and the power that you have as a parent, and you speak that life into that child, and you speak God's purposes into this atmosphere. And at that time, a lady says, oh, do you have a non-profit yet? I think you need a non-profit. So it's just been a progression of my relationship with him. It's just been a progression of our time at the kitchen table. It's just been a progression. It's in us all to do.

Bringing His Presence Everywhere

There's a world out there that needs you. And that's why you were made. So let's fill that space with who told you you were an image bearer of the king. And take that and own that as your core at the center of your very being. And when you walk in a room, you're bringing in the presence of the king. And when you walk in the grocery store... You're bringing in the presence of the King. And when you walk in the schoolhouse, you're bringing in the presence of the King. And we will impact this world like none other. For our understanding has changed. Because He never does.

God's Not Done With You Yet

Thank you. I was about to ask if you were impacted today. Those that were impacted by today's message, I want to invite you to have... a clearer walk and a clearer understanding of God's purposes in your life. Despite what you're going through, despite what you've been exposed to, despite what you've experienced in your life, despite the rocky places that you found yourself in or find yourself in now, God's not done with you yet, never. And so I hope this message was one of encouragement and one that gives hope because that's something the word always does— give hope.

Stand and Embrace the Message

And so I would ask that you would stand today and join us in worship as we conclude services. But if God is speaking to you today and you know that you too can discover change, I invite you to embrace that message. And if you need prayer today, we have prayer team on either side of the stage. Make that connection with God today. Today.

Leave Your Burdens Here

And maybe you have something that you've been carrying around for such a long time, and it's been burdensome, and it's been heavy, and it's been something that you feel like is just a part of you that's never going to go away, so you just need to accept it. Our God is an amazing God of second and third and fourth and fifth chances. He is a God that gives hope. He is a God that takes burdens away, and you can leave that burden here today. If you want to set something down at the altar, it's appropriate to do so, to come and just kneel and be with God.

Prayer, Shema, and Blessing

Alvina Malkinu, our Father, our King, Father, we thank you for sending people into our lives and into our fellowship to speak your word, to speak from the Spirit, to remind us of who you are and what you've done and what you can do if we would just ask and lift our arms to you. We thank you, Father, for your sweet mercy, your sweet grace. In Yeshua's name we pray, amen. Let's sing the Shema. Hear, O Israel, the Lord is our God, the Lord is one. Blessed is the name of his glorious kingdom for all eternity. Amen. May the Lord bless you and keep you. May the Lord make his face to shine upon you and be gracious to you. May the Lord lift up his countenance toward you and give you his peace. Shabbat Shalom family.